Mediator Status Renewed

I am happy to report that I am once again listed as a Rule 114 ADR Neutral. This means I can accept referral for mediations from court cases. I gave up my Rule 114 designation when I was too busy with my old managment job.

A mediator acts as a neutral third party who facilitates the resolution of a conflict. I have found that skills in coaching work very similarly to mediation.

Shaun Jamison
www.guideonyourside.com

A Perfect Storm of New Words?

Just so you can keep up and be "hip," you should know that Merriam-Webster has come out with a 100 new words. Words and phrases such as "ginormous," "speed dating" and my personal favorite "smackdown" are officially part of the Merriam's dictionary now.

Shaun Jamison
www.guideonyourside.com

Switching Roles

"Walk a mile in their shoes . . ." My wife was out of town for a few days for the first time in a very long time. I try to be a good partner, but well, honestly I don't have an eye for the details of housekeeping. I see big messes. I never understood the issue over the nearly invisible messes. Until now.

For the first couple of days I stuck to my routine of seeing the critical tasks - laundry, dishes, cleaning up big disasters. But then, it was time for my sister to visit. Finding all of the nearly invisible messes the children had left took me two hours of non-stop cleaning. Shredded paper here, unauthorized haircut remains there, a cup full of water as a booby-trap for unaware adults, and the list goes on. I realize now that the children leave the big messes to distract us from their more insidious assaults on tidiness. Naturally, I did this while the little ones were asleep and as soon as they woke up, they went about undoing my ordered assault on their disorder.

Then it was time for her to come home. One more time cleaning up . . . The house passed inspection, but I don't think I'll ever look at it quite the same again.

Shaun Jamison
www.guideonyourside.com
(c) 2007 All Rights Reserved

Too Many Emails!

Do you have this challenge? I bet you do. Here are some basic tips:

1. Unsubscribe to newsletters you just delete anyway. Save yourself a step.
2. If your email allows you to filter email into folders, set up rules to prioritize email. I.e., if it has an FW in the subject heading for "Forward" it goes into a folder that *maybe* you'll read.
3. If you have employees, teach them to use email efficiently. Concise, descriptive subject lines are very helpful to manage email. Senders should be clear about expectations - do they want a response or action? Only copy emails to people who *actually* need to see them.
4. If there is a string of emails going back and forth, schedule a call and resolve the issue. Again, only copy in people who need to know.
5. Delete, delete, delete. Set aside time to handle emails and delete or file them.
6. Answer your email. Not answering email only gives birth to more email or hard feelings. If you give out your email address, then do utilize it or don't let people know your address.
7. Let people know your preferences. When is an email appropriate or a call or voicemail? You know your habits, be honest.
8. Don't forward junk mail to others, it will only encourage them to send it to you and others. Those "alerts" are almost only bogus, so not only do they waste time, they often needless upset people. Chain letters weren't funny when they were in paper and they haven't improved in email.
9. Try sending a note through the postal system once in a while. It has a much better chance of being read these days than email. . .

Shaun G. Jamison, JD, PhD
www.guideonyourside.com
(c) 2007 All Rights Reserved

Cherished Assumptions

A huge pop culture bubble recently burst. The widely held belief that women talked far more than men has been called into question by research co-authored by James Pennebaker and reported by USA Today. The results were that women talked a little more than men, but not a significant amount. Granted, one study does not tell the whole story, but it does make me wonder what other “common sense” widely accepted notions exist in our culture that have yet to be challenged.

What assumptions do you think should be challenged?

Shaun

(c) 2007 Shaun G. Jamison, JD, PhD All Rights Reserved
www.guideonyourside.com

External Critics

We all have critics, some live within us and others without. Sometimes they communicate in unfortunate ways. Today, however, I wanted to focus on listening to external critics.

As parents of young children, we like to find fun and appropriate activities with our children. The kids like movies, but the "pickings" are slim. Enter "Evan Almighty," a story set in the modern day about a man who is chosen by God to build an Ark just like Noah.

I kept hearing negative reviews about the movie. For whatever reason, the critics were not kind. The previews looked funny and the story premise was interesting. No one said the movie was actually bad for kids or objectionable, so we took a risk.

I am so glad I did not listen to the "external critics" and pass on this movie. It was a lot of fun, inoffensive, child appropriate, and had a decent "moral of the story." The kids had a great time and we were entertained too.

My moral of the story was to look for what was not being said. Most of the critics were not saying the movie was horrible or offensive, what they were really saying is that it wasn't a movie they enjoyed. Perhaps it wasn't up to their standards. So be it! Let the rest of us have a good time. I enjoy complex movies and art films sometimes, but my kids won't.

I hope that that critics learn to embrace more wholesome movies for kids and in the meantime, I am looking for a new source of information. I will continue to employ my own critical skills to the criticisms of others.

Shaun

(c) 2007 Shaun G. Jamison All Rights Reserved
www.guideonyourside.com