Leadership and Self-Deception
I just read a very interesting book by the Arbinger Institute. Normally I really do not care for "fable" books that are ever-so-popular in the business success genre. However, Leadership and Self-Deception is worthy of an exception to my general dislike. One reason is that it is fairly specific and gives examples that most people reading the book will relate to and understand. The another reason is that it is not a quick fix or fad, it is about making a meaningful, difficult change in ourselves that requires monitoring and renewal.
Are you interested yet? Or are you turned off because I cannot offer a quick fix? I do not want to spoil the book for you, but consider this. Have you ever noticed how some relationships spin out of control? And that if you have the courage to sit down to talk to the other person or group, they are just as confused about what happened as you are? Do you really help a person do better in their job or relationship by blaming or demonizing them? Who is that about really?
All through our lives some things go well with other people and other times, not so good. I suspect based on this book, you will find that the times when it goes well are the times when you are open to other people and not focused on yourself or justifying your actions or feelings. When relationships do not go well is when we focus on how we have been mistreated or what our needs are. There are definitely times we need to take care of ourselves, but have we hit the right balance yet?
Shaun Jamison
(C) 2005 All Rights Reserved
posted by Shaun @ 11:05 AM
3 comments
3 Comments:
Shaun I just stumbled upon your blog ( as is obvious) and it makes me so happy that I can relate to what you're talking about.Its something that Ive een struggling with,somehow when a relationship goes bad we tend to blame the other person and focus on ourselves in a not so constructive manner.Have you read"The Power of Now" ?
I haven't, but I like the title! Thank you for your comments. Shaun
After reading the book or should I say listening and reading, I can not stand it for many reasons. One there is a effort not to say what the real problem is, they just rename it and sell it off as something profound. The problem is not “self-deception”the new name, it’s selfishness, self-centered, proud, and prideful. I learned about all these while at church, when I started reading the book and the listening, I became irradiated and upset because I thought I was going to hear something profound and new, far from it and that's what made me upset someone was selling something that had been around for centuries. The Arginger Institute should at least tell people that they just rewrote the concept of how to be a good person, respect yourself and treat others the way you want to be treated. Give me a break Arbinger get out of the box and look around you, you are not the only ones out there who can come up with a factious story and apply be good to your neighbor family and friends concepts. The names have been changed, the concept has been around since the beginning of time and I learned these as a child from my parents and leaders, no daycare for me, just a good Mom and a swat on the pants. And one other things there are to many assumptions and drawn conclusions from unknown facts, facts that may not be true, and there are no foot notes.
Post a Comment
<< Home